I’m still here. Still pregnant. Still chugging along quite nicely.
I haven’t had time to blog because most of my days are consumed with counting my new stretch marks. They appear faster than I can count them.
(But seriously though stretch marks are a curse and a plague. All those bitches who didn’t get stretch marks can take a hike.)
The real reason I haven’t been blogging is mainly work related. My boss is away for 6 weeks and I’ve been temporarily promoted into her role. It means much longer hours at work and much busier tasks because I’m doing her role, plus my own at the same time.
I’m loving that they trust me to do this role at 34 weeks pregnant. But also terrified that I’m doing this at 34 weeks pregnant.
That, coupled with the fact I’m still not sleeping great at night. The baby has turned breech and her gigantic boof head is permanently lodged under my ribcage on my upper right side. Her favourite thing to do right now is put her hands above her head and dig into my ribs. She’s a violent little bugger…
If you remember I had gall bladder problems around 7 weeks pregnant and had to go to hospital. Well now she’s pushing up against my stomach and gall bladder day and night and I’m in constant pain. Particularly when I eat. Yay!
My doctor is getting a bit concerned and says I’m having regular gall bladder attacks now. They’re monitoring the situation as they can’t remove my gall bladder until the baby has been evicted from her stretch marked palace.
In other news, I want to thank those of you who gave me advice about the whooping cough booster. I did further research, thought long and hard, and then decided to get my shot a few weeks ago.
I was completely paranoid for the first few days after I received the shot, but now I’m very happy with my decision and feeling confident that fatso will have some of my vaccine protection when she’s born.
Speaking of being born, I went to the bathroom yesterday (as I tend to do 100 times a day) and when I wiped I noticed what looked like a giant piece of snot on the toilet paper.
I called my mother into the bathroom, told her I had something extremely gross to show her, and asked her if she thought part of my mucus plug had fallen out.
“Oh I wouldn’t know.” said my mother. “I never had a mucus plug with any of my pregnancies.”
For a moment I just looked at her like she’d grown a second head, and she looked back at me like I was silly.
“You…had a mucus plug…” I said slowly. “Every pregnant woman has a mucus plug.”
“No. Not me.” she replied confidently.
“Maybe you’ve just forgotten?” I suggested.
“No.” she said adamantly. “I never had them. Never. They’re a new thing.”
“You did, Mum.” I insisted. “They’re not a new thing. They aren’t artificially added to pregnancies through some sort of medicinal technological advancement. They’re just…there. For every woman. For every pregnancy. It stops bacteria getting into the uterus.”
“Oh well if you say so.” she shrugged. “But if I had one, I never saw it.”
Is she right here? Or am I right? Or am I crazy? Or what?
I mean maybe she just never saw her plugs? That’s possible right? Maybe she didn’t have a bloody show and didn’t lose the plugs until she was in labour?
Anyway…moving right along to something even more gross than mucus plugs…
Two boys have asked me out in the past two weeks.
Am I the only person really sickened by this?
I mean what are these guys thinking? I’m massively pregnant and neither of them know the full situation with James.
I was warned about this. I was warned that some guys are just into pregnant girls. I didn’t believe it was true until now.
One of them told me I was a MILF and he meant it in the very literal sense of the acronym. I mean that’s just…creepy.
The other told me I’m a total babe and he’d love to take me out to dinner.
Ew. No. Go away. Never come near me again.
To be honest things are going much, much better with James. I’ll properly update on that situation soon but for the most part since he moved back to the city we have stopped fighting, our communication is heaps better and he’s much more supportive.
I’d say we’re back in a very friendly place. Not a place where I’m looking to reconcile with him, but a place where we can co-exist happily as friends.
He has even started sending me money to help out with my bills. Not a huge amount of money, but anything is more than nothing. He’s given me $600 so far. Nothing compared to the thousands I’ve spent, but at least he’s making an effort.
He also sat through eight hours of antenatal classes with me a couple of weeks ago. That’s a whole lot of hours for a guy who refused to even pay attention to my 20 minute nuchal scan a few short months ago. I know his behaviour tends to change rapidly, but I’d say at the moment he gets an A+ for attitude improvement.
When I told him these guys had asked me out he got super angry and said he wanted to drive to Paradise and kick their asses for trying to date me while I’m a month away from giving birth to his child. And I totally get where he’s coming from. That would make me mad too.
Thankfully I diffused the situation and there was no ass kicking involved. Particularly as I stressed I wasn’t interested in dating anybody at this time, or any time in the near future. Because…gross.
And that’s pretty much it for this post.
Lots more to talk about but my lunch break at work is over and I’ve got about 100 things to do before the day is over.
Hopefully update soon!
p.s I got some professional maternity photos taken last week and I’m seriously in love with them. Is there a way I can post them privately and you guys still see them? I don’t want the whole of the internet to see them but happy for my followers to catch a glimpse of my face without the protective heart sticker haha.